WEEK TEN DISCUSSION BOARD FOUR SCENE AND FIRST PAGE OF A TEN MINUTE PLAY FROM CLASS LIST

Department store –Late Evening at Closing Time

There is no one left on the store floor, the store is quiet and empty except for Alice who glides along the aisles and displays, choosing various items from the shelves as if she were in another world. 

Alice is out of place, elegantly dressed, has full make up and carries a large purse.  She has a thin, well cared for figure, she walks with exaggerated grace, her once lovely face shows signs of time that has passed and she appears tired.

Alice has been putting seemingly random objects in her bag and checks it to see that she has remembered to ‘get’ everything she needs. She picks up a stuffed shark and puts it in her bag as she looks over her shoulder to be sure there is no one watching. A puppet monkey on shelf behind her speaks.. Alice is more offended than surprised at being spoken to with such lack of deference to her social standing and level of fame and success which demands anyone to assume the position of ‘fan.’

PUPPET

(Demanding, accusatory tone)

What do you need that for?

ALICE

(Turning around quickly, not the least guilty.  She is irritated that she is being disturbed)

I beg your pardon? And who are you?  I am used to being addressed as Ms. Walker.  And we should be properly introduce by my agent, I never speak to anyone off the street, I’ll have you know.

PUPPET

(Aggressively pursuing his questioning, unhesitatingly.  He assumes the tone of an attorney)

Don’t change the subject.  I asked you a question. Who is that shark for?

ALICE

(She stands queenly and looks down at the puppet, her tone is imperious and impatient)

It’s for Gidget, my French poodle. She likes to have something to cuddle up with at night to help her go to sleep. She gets so fidgety when I take her on the yacht, otherwise she is perfectly well behaved.

PUPPET

(Peering into her bag)

Yeah, Lady.  And the rest of that stuff?  You've got everything but a fridge and a fish tank in that bag....What are the designer pillow cases for?

ALICE

You are insolent, who gives you the permission to interrogate me?  If you really must know, the beds on my yacht require custom made sheets that I have made by my personal seamstress but the pillows are standard and I do need to have silk to sleep on…  Armani is my favorite designer, I only his Italian silk fabrics for all my linens, I wouldn’t be able to sleep on anything else now that I am used to Giò.

PUPPET

Well, picky,picky.  What about the fake, glass goldfish? 'Those designer fish? Did ‘Giò’make those too?

ALICE

Well! I have never! I refuse to be questioned by a puppet, and a monkey at that....and one who has not been properly introduced. The idea... (She sniffs, incensed) (Pause) The goldfish are for the fish tank on the yacht I mentioned, I already have one, thank you very much.  Which is precisely why I do  not need one in my bag.

PUPPET

(Lowering his voice)

You know you can get in trouble for what you are doing? I could call a guard and have you escorted out of the store, maybe even arrested.

ALICE

(Imperious, she assumes the posture of a teacher giving a lesson to a pupil)

You are inanimate. I would like to know just how you think you are going to get the attention of a guard and how can you expect to be believed by anyone?  I know more than a thing or two about acting and being believable and I assure you that being a stuffed animal is not going to help you a bit.

PUPPET

(Taking on a friendly and persuasive tone)

Look ...  I won’t call anyone and you take me with you, how ‘bout it? (Pause) Where d’you say you’re goin’?

(He looks at his hands like he is checking his cuticles and could not care less what the answer is, his tone is casual)

ALICE

(Hesitates)

PUPPET

(Trying to gain her confidence)

Isn’t that shark just gonna scare your little poodle? I mean if she' s 'fraid to go on a boat, a ‘shark’ isn’t really the right theme, is it?

ALICE

(Keeping her imperious tone of voice)

I beg your pardon Sir, it is not a ‘boat,’ mine is a yacht, thank you very much.

PUPPET

(Lacking in formality or respect)

‘Yacht’, ‘boat’, whatever... Will ‘ya take me with you? (Expectantly, with urgency)

ALICE

(As if talking to herself)

I suppose I could use some company, it is getting late and I do hate to walk out in the dark without being accompanied.  My chauffeur's away on sick leave and it is so tiring to go about things without someone to talk to…even my agent hasn’t answered my calls lately, I just detest that kind of rudeness in people.